An Intern got called late one Friday night by a VA ward nurse to clarify an order for some drug to be delivered "AS, bid". Having never heard of the drug and no idea what the heck"AS" means, Rick asked why the patient was in the hospital. "Well, he's having a colonoscopy on Monday", the nurse replied. Rick astutely deduced that 'AS' must mean 'anal sphincter', and ordered the drug to be delivered as such.
The ENT resident came by on Monday morning to find that the patient had been getting cortisporin otic up his backside twice a day for an entire weekend. AS means "left ear".
A worried patient tells an opthalmologist Doc, I am very scared about the outcome of the operation on my left eye. What are my chances?" Grinning doctorsays " Don't worry, you'll never see the difference "
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